And it’s not just to provide support of those suffering, but to those of you who never had to give a second thought to having a family. I hope that you become more sensitive and aware of the possible suffering and longing of those around you and alter your actions and words to be more thoughtful and compassionate.

One day it will happen. We will become mommas. We’ll have to get up at all hours of the night for feedings, we’ll be the ones cleaning up messy explosions, we’ll be disciplining our children and dealing with toddler tantrums in the middle of the grocery store. We’ll comfort our teenagers after their first break-up and cry when our babies graduate. One day… it will happen. And while the waiting is the hardest part, the disappointment, fear and frustration stinks pretty freakin’ bad too. So, until our day comes — I hope this eases the pain.. even just a little bit.

There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children, I know that I will be better.

I will be better not because of genetics, or money, or that I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.

I have longed and waited. I have cried and prayed. I have endured and planned over and over again. Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.

I will notice everything about my child. I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold, and feed him, and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot, or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me.

I count myself lucky in this sense: that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see. Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love.

I will be a better mother for all that I have endured.

I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend, and sister because I have known pain.

I know disillusionment, as I have been betrayed by my own body.

I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.

I have prevailed.

I have succeeded.

I have won.

So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.

I listen.

And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely.

I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and that life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.

I have learned to appreciate life.

Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.

And so will you.

So again, he’s been reeeeally craving something that he could work on that was more…uhh.. manly.

He ended up deciding to build a woodshed that would keep all our firewood dry. He said he wanted to build it because he wanted the wood away from the house since wood attracts bugs, termites, etc. (which makes complete sense to me!) I’m pretty sure he also just wanted an excuse to lug those power tools outside and build something with his own hands.

Months ago, Alex found the plans he wanted to use and we hunted Home Depot/Lowe’s/other various lumber stores to get an estimate on how much the supplies would cost. The total was a little more than we wanted to spend on something that… you know… holds wood, but after much research we (and by we, you know, I don’t mean me) knew it would be less than a third of the price of pre-fabbed sheds and higher quality. So, all we needed was a nice weekend to get the motivation to crank this bad boy out.

I would also like to add that I thought this project would be a “work on it when you could” kind of thing. Not.so.much. It ended up getting built over one weekend and stained the following. However, I will say that Alex had some help from a good friend, Dan, and really wanted to take advantage of the extra set of hands (and we couldn’t be more thankful for all the help)!

I wasn’t even home during the first day of construction so I don’t have a lot of the very early pictures… but here ya go!

This was what it looked like the morning of day two.

(of course, you know that we didn’t leave all those supplies out over night….)

More Alex and Dan…

By the end of the first weekend, we had a shed that looked like this…

All we had left was to stain it and add the roof. So, the following weekend (yay for nice spring days!) we got to work… And yes, this time I do mean WE. Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures that were taken in the middle of staining. We were messy and dirty and bleeeeh, and I wasn’t planning to subject my camera to that

Here you can see how big the shed is compared to our ladders…

Alex putting on the roof –

And…. DRUMROLL….

Final product:

Aren’t those dogs amazing for posing for me *all on their own*? Haha… I wish!

Now we just need to fill up that shed with a bunch of firewood!

funny story: the couple that lives behind us had their granddaughter over during this building process. I guess they were nosey and wanted to know what in the heck we were building, so they sent her over to ask Alex. When Alex responded saying a woodshed… she said, “oh! I thought you were building a STAGE!”

Now I can’t get this stage idea out of my head! Could you imagine having a party and a band setting up there… UHHH. Perfect.

I should also mention that these two boys were the perfect helpers. Hunter even brought over Dan’s bottle of water to him. In his mouth. Sounds appetizing, right?

(I have to say one more time.. a biiiiig thank you to Dan for helping so much!)

To my defense — life just happened. How’s that for a blanket, general excuse? Lately I’ve been falling out of love with documenting my every move and wanted to step back and really enjoy things. I needed to spend more time concentrating at work. I wanted to spend more time completely “in the moment” at home. Let’s just say — I needed to step back for a bit. And, my dears, I’m happy that I did.

Here are a few things you missed out on:

• I celebrated my 25th birthday. Even though Alex was deployed on the actual day, he went above and beyond to make my day special. We’re talking flowers getting delivered to work and hiding cards around the house for me to find while he was gone. We had a big celebration before he left town, so I was thoroughly loved on. Don’t you worry. Plus, my mom and friends stepped up to the plate and surrounded me with happiness on my big day.
• Two days after my birthday, I hurt my back during an early morning Body Pump class — doing squats… on the very first track post warm up. I ended up at the doctors — who sent me to the hospital. Boo. I had to take a couple days off work, but thankfully, I’m feeling a million times better now. A big, biiiig thanks to my mom who helped me get up and down for days.
• We had a random springtime snow storm.
• Then we skipped over spring and jumped head-first into summer. Weird.
• Alex came home safe and sound from his short trip/deployment (YAYYY!)
• He immediately jumped into a pretty hefty woodworking project (more on that later)
• We’re currently planning an upcoming vacation and are counting down the days! Anyone have any recommendations for Charleston, SC? We absolutely love the down-home southern feel that we experience on our Nashville vacation last year (part one and part two). We’re so excited to get back down south. Not only will we be exploring one of the tastiest southern cities, but we’ll seeing a concert, celebrating our anniversary, AND seeing one of my absolute best friends, Liz, and her manly man.
• We met a new puppy! No, we didn’t take him home though (more on this adventure later too)

Want to see some pictures?

Good. Me too.

I have so much more to show you, but when I started to gather all my pictures for this post — I quickly surpassed thirty. Aaaaand… that’s too many for one little post. I’ll be back shortly with more from our latest adventures (including puppy pictures (and I’m talking a 7-week old golden!), doggy play dates, and that big project Alex completed).

Here’s a hint of what the project is…

Any ideas?

See you soon! Have a great night